Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Just another Tuesday

So what has been going on my life since the unbelievably sad week i had last week? I guess not a whole lot. Ive been thinking about my other friend J who is also having struggles with her dad's health as he is moving to a facility to take care of him with his advancing ALS. He is moving today, out of her childhood home, out, oy, my friends need to catch a break.

Nothing is going on in my life, i have been feeling like I can get a lot of my energy right now by doing things for others. It does feel selfishly good to be helpful; I slaved away for 2-3 hours on Sunday to make homemade lasagna and a chocolate chocolate chip cake my my sister-in-law and her family as they readjust to thier new arrival. Although i am not sure i will get much thanks for that. I also made some cake for matt's parents and they were BEYOND appreciative by how good it was, and it was pretty good if i do say so myself. In fact, i think it might be one of my all time favorite desserts. Saturday night i went up to Dayton to celebrate two wonderful friend's engagement... it was a great time. We went out to Mexican and then bowling-- which i haven't done in yeeeears. I bowled a huge 44!! But it was fun to spend time with that whole gang, and catch up with some who i dont get to see very often. they truly are some great friends.

This week I dont have much going on; I went over to E's to watch the Bachelor last night and catch up with her. That was nice. Tonight is LOST with matt (which i am also excited about), and then who knows what this week and weekend will have in store. I gave Matt the ultimatum that is he doesnt take action to buy a new computer by the end of this month I will... so we'll see how that goes this weekend.

It's been almost 5 months since we've been married and we still haven't given out photographer a few songs to put into our wedding video. we gotta do that this weekend. Got any good suggestions?

Lots of random thoughts, but i think i will close for right now. Just going to keep on swimming....

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

A peaceful passing and a new beginning

I went. I went to NYC because I found out a couple hours before i left for the airport the services were going to held after i returned. I went, I felt sorry i wasn't in town when she called and texted me to hangout. But I dont think she was mad. I went to the visitation and the mass last night and it was beautiful. I cried a lot for K, her family and D. It was beautiful and just so sad. I am thinking about her constantly right now as i know in the next hour she is going to be burying her dad. I can only imagine how hard it's going to be for her and the family. K will probably never know how sick i feel not knowing how to be a good friend to her, or how to be helpful to her right now, i just never know what the right thing to do is. All you can do is pray.

As sad as all this is, there was a birth this weekend. Matt's brother and sister-in-law had a new baby. We visited in the hospital yesterday morning and he is beautiful. Mom and baby are both doing well. I got a little teary-eyed when i first saw him. What an emotional weekend.

It's ironic that today is the first day of Lent. I am going to mass again with matt for Ash Wednesday in about 1/2 hour. Hopefully my next post will be only brighter.

Rest in Peace D, may you live on forever in the hearts of your family. K is surely a reflection of you. Welcome home.
And to new baby, Ben.... cant wait to see what trials and triumphs await you. Life is fast.

Thursday, February 11, 2010

The Not Knowing

Things here always remain interesting, and of course, ever-changing. I am not sure what gaps to fill-in since the last post, but i sure have been busy. Highlights/low lights probably include some long days standing in Matt's dad's garage writing off goodwill, eating out with friends, trivia night, having friends over to dinner, gosh who knows. This weekend New York City is in my plans to visit my sister and my entire family has been looking forward to this long weekend since before Christmas.

here is the thing. One of my good friend's dad is dying of pancreatic cancer. Yes, he was diagnosed a while ago and he has been deteriorating every since she went on sabbatical from work back in August. However, she is home again because her dad was admitted into hospice and the nurses do believe this is probably the end. It's horrible, he isn't eating, he is heavily sedated with pain meds, and the whole family is just bracing for a peaceful passing. This girl was in my wedding, obviously not just an acquaintance. No, what do i do? If he dies and the funeral is this weekend what do i do with these non-refundable $300+ plane tickets and all the plans over the weekend? I sound like an awful person even posting the question. Matt thinks i should go, but it's his logic talking. My heart is so heavy not knowing when it will happen and what the right thing to do in this situation is. It's heavy thinking about my friend. It's a tough week.... Please send some advice if anyone is out there.