Another non notable post....

I am rather unmotivated at work today, although I am swamped with stuff on my to-do list. We are amidst Spring Budget Formulation so I am usually the lead on this with practically my entire team on some combination or work related travel, annual leave or temporary duty. But id rather be busy than bored.
None the less, my blog is neglected and I feel compelled to pay it some attention.

Now what do i have to say?

I know i have been struggling over the past year over what to share on here and what not to, based on the nature of whats going in my life and the privacy of those involved. In any case whatever is posted on here,  I am realizing is that i have been learning all kinds of lessons. No one chooses to be involved in stressful, tough situations; people chose money, beauty, power, etc.... people don't choose character development.  That is last on the list.  I know i cant hold up my vision of the world 2+ years ago right next to my vision of the world today and compare the two. But i do know the two views are very different.  The landscape is bigger, the colors are a little more vibrant, i have picked up on details that i never noticed, and some things in the perspective have picked up new meaning to me.

I also know that the time seems to go so much faster; it's funny that you always hear from grandparents your entire childhood that time goes quicker as you get older... but i never though i would feel it in my twenties. I mean  the days and weeks go so quick, where does the time go? I do need to remind myself to slow down a lot, and it's a tough thing to remember....

A lot of the little things  that used to wind me up no longer bother me. Things in my head involving my friends used to eat away at my heart,  problems outside my control used to make me so nervous, I started letting go of things i have held on to and stressed about for way longer than need be.  My faith has played a big role, as well as the incredible people that are in my life.

Now, i don't think anything that has been happening my life has been notably catastrophic.... it's just the stuff of life; there are ups and there are downs. I mean all i need to do it think about the Haiti disaster over a year ago and now the tsunami in Japan a couple weeks ago-- devastation that just seems inconceivable. Suffering that you cannot physically wrap your mind around unless you are actually living it.   How precious life is and disasters like this DO happen..... my heart just fills up emotion.

But to bring things back to the daily level, i am learning to appreciate these every day lessons. And i am cherishing the really, really good days. Like spending J's birthday with her and A last night. Going to the dari bar, laughing, sharing, being there fore each other.  Or even listening to a friend cry on the phone and feeling in my heart she will be OK and this is what true friendship is. Or hearing such extreme happiness in my Mom's voice yesterday over the phone, and having her tell me how much she cant wait to give me a hug. Its the moments you don't really remember later but the feelings you don't shake.

Until next time....

Quick update.

I haven't posted in a while.... mainly for lack of content i am willing to share. However, the good news is things are finally starting to look up. And the best part, we have a brief peak into spring this week. Windows open, sun shining, birds chirping in the morning. O ya, and longer days! The sun isn't setting until well after 7, almost 8 now..... These things make me happy.

IN other news, my joy right now being spinning classes, i finally broke down and brought a heart rate monitor. AND it is AWESOME! I can finally track to see what zone i am working in during the ride, check to see it it hit my 90th percent heart rate zone, and see how many calories i am burning. Yesterday;s class was the first class and i loved it. Although i was surprised that didn't burn as many calories as i would have thought, only 452. Which doesn't really seem like a whole lot.... but i guess we'll see if it changes depending on the kind of ride we have.

March is almost over, i cant believe it's the 22nd. Last week we celebrated Odie McPoderson's 6th birthday on the 15th. Happy birthday, little man!  Next weekend i might be able to see my family again! In a more relaxed setting (a very happy thing),  and before i know it April is right around the corner.

Our lilies have started to come up around our house. I AM ready for the cold to be behind me!

Until next time....

No Title

Its fascinating that the more we understand about the mind, the more we learn that we don't understand it.  I say this because as i go through this hopefully brief section of my life, I am gaining an ever growing appreciation for a healthy life style and a healthy mind.  The past week or so dealing with one of life's many curve balls, has really brought a lot of issues in my own life to light.   I thought what i went through last year in June with one of my best friends was one of the hardest things to deal with and understand, but i guess that experience was just preparing me for this past week.  And although i cannot go into detail for my family's privacy, i think i have a lot of lessons to learn that i don't need to be so cryptic about.

1). Relationships are important and no matter what you are going through in life, the relationships that have real value are the ones that can withstand anything.  

2) It's important to be honest with yourself and others. When you think you need to be secretive about something you should re-evaluate what you are really doing.

3). The stress you have in your life is normal, but understanding the problem that stressed you out AS WELL AS the stress you have really are two problems that need to be delt with. The ladder being the most important.

4) Family comes first, there will be no other people as important as family.

A very small handful of people in my life know about the 'curve ball' that my family is dealing with right now. But it's a little gift to feel the happiness remembering that the people that do know are indispensable in my life. And in my family's life.

And that it's important to take care of yourself above all else.



** this post my have not made much sense, i am very tired and exhausted writing it.... but felt it was worth posting.