Mantra

"Just let it go" should be my new mantra... for those things that continuously get under my skin. Usually the re-occurring stressors involve my so-called "friends" (just 2 of them in particular) or stupid people. The latter is easier to 'just let it go', but the friend part always seems to get at me. And i need to continuously remind myself to let it go, I cant control the situation, I've done what I can. And I can begin saving myself a LOT of heartache, stress, and unnecessary-endless conversations about my feelings with those around me because I feel to need to vent (again, again, and again). So, in the spirit of the serenity prayer, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can; and the wisdom to know the difference.

So, in the spirit of hte paragraph above lots of other good things going on. I hosted my LAST open row last night of the season and it was great. I did it by myself and it went flawlessly. No problems, got everyone in boats and out of boats before dark, no one crashed, no one injured, and everyone who showed up was placed in either doubles or quads. Considering I was the last on the water and a little stressed worried about all my little ducklings making their way up and down the river without problems, I managed to have a pretty good workout. I rowed with a new french rower (who works at the flavor factory and unlocked the mystery to the weird-often spoiled cheese smell-- the resonates about 10 exits up i-75). We rowed fast and hard and I feel sore today. Its a good feeling.

This weekend I have packed with tons of plans. Saturday night I am playing with J and A and going to the counting crows/maroon-5 concert! its going to be so much fun, we always have so much fun together! Sunday is the WEBN fireworks so ill have a little gathering at my house-- hopefully not too stressful given the crazy amount of people coming downtown and the complete inability to get people in/out of the elevators that day. A lot of people have plans or are going out of town so who knows how many people ill actually get to come over. On Monday is the big, BIG party at Matt's house. I am going to be doing a LOT of cooking and baking and getting lots of stuff for him with the amount of people he invited. I think if the weather is nice its going to be a HUGE success. I am most excited about that than anything- his family, our friends, his coworkers, my family, lots of people are invited and I think its going to be a pretty good turnout. The only downside to the whole thing is that I have to work the next morning.... boooo.

As for tonight I am looking forward to no plans whatsoever. I think Matt and I may go grocery shopping for the tons of stuff he needs to get for his party. We may go rollerblading though:) I dont know, we usually find fun stuff to do together on agenda-less nights.Those are the best nights. We also like to play tag around my apartment-- we chase each other around my kitchen hall- around to my living-room and back-- around and around and occasionally ill not know where he is coming from and sneak up and scare me. We've always gotten a kick out of scaring each other. Waiting for the other to come out of the bathroom and jumping out somewhere, or waiting for the other to walk into the kitchen, ha, its like we reverted backwards by about 15 years. But now i think its "our little thing." and its kinda fun:)

Well, better get some work done.

Olympics Ending

One more thought before the weekend.... I think these next few days are the final days of the 2008 summer olympics. I am SO sad but so ready to get my life back. I have been up late almost EVERY single week night watching all the good stuff on NBC. I swear the extra good stuff comes on past 10:30. Why, why, WHY?? So in the spirit of the Olympics, here are a few of my favorites/highlights:

(in no particular order)

- Michael Phelps winning 8 gold medals
-Gymnastics (shocking for me!)
-Track (even see Lolo Jones lose :( )
-Women's marathon
-150 mile bike race
-Pole Vault
-Platform diving
-Michael Pehlps
-Mens Sweep Rowing
-Womens/Mens Sculls
-BMX (saw if for the first time last ngith- AWESOme!)
-Michael Phelps
o and did i mention Michael Phelps? (not to mention he is extremely pleasing to the eyes in a wetsuit)

Only have to wait 4 more years until the next summer games....

Little time

I know I have been terribly deficient towards posting recently, work and life has been hectic. I have been in Financial Managers training since last Monday and have had no time to breathe. Literally, between KPMG's audit, my usual work, other mindless data-calls, and being in class 8 hours each day has left literally ZERO time for posting. Ugh, i am stressed out just posting this right now. I would just like to sit at work un-bothered for like 3 hours and I can get back to my peaceful/comfortable/in-control state of mind.

Outside of work has been busy but good. I have gotten a lot accomplished including my apartment totally cleaned (bathtub, closets, and All), got Matt's house together and did TONS of yard work, put together his patio, organized his video games, CLEANED, and still managed to have plenty of time with friends. I got to row a few times, hang out with the girls for dinner, hang out with my other girls for Party in the Park, and even managed to make plans for the next few weekends! Things are looking up.

It feels good to get things accomplished, it totally shifts your mental state and motivates even more. Last weekend I kept up with my positive effort and baked cookies and blueberry muffins for my neighbors AND Matt's neighbors. It felt great! This week i haven't figured out what to do yet, but I am going to be spending a lot of quality time with my friends. That is pretty fulfilling in itself.

I dont have much time to post, I am really looking forward to the weekend. Just a few more hours. Next week hopefully will be better. No training= less stress. At least I hope so.

Olympics

Gosh I love the Olympics! I used to get really into the winter games when i was little-- mostly because my parents (mostly my mom) loved the ice skating events. Because she watched them so avidly we naturally got into the competition too. We even had a little get-togethers with out neighbors with ice cream and popcorn and watched the ice skating together--we even had our favorite skaters!

As I got older my time available to devote to such things grew more scarce, and to be honest- i barely remember watching much of any of them in the last 6-8 years. This year, and especially this weekend when the games started- I am hooked! These are best 17 days of TV all summer! I was lucky enough to catch the opening ceremony my dad 'dvr'ed- which were AWESOME by the way, and the following games i caught this weekend were great. I am even following the medal count ( USA-12, China- 13). I havent quite decided which are my favorite-- so far i have seen a lot of the swimming events (IMs, mens 100 breast, womans 100 back, women's relay), I actually got the Womens 2x sculls, AND the mens 2x sweep rowing (I think my favorite so far), i saw some gymnastics last night, saw the cycling (150 mi race)-- well, parts of it, and a little bit of sand and regular volleyball. I hope to catch some diving and some track events soon-- those tend to really catch my attention. And matt tells me table-tennis is o so impressive too. I am excited!

I really have no other exciting news to report this week. I had a great weekend, I got to see my parents a lot this weekend AND hangout with my best friends. Went over to her and her sister's new apartment (which was so cute) and hung out there for a few hours in the afternoon on Saturday. Sat outside by the pool, her lovely sister made us lunch, and we just sat around and chatted for a while. Gosh did it make me wish we lived closer! We had a great dinner on Saturday night and we just hung out with my parents the rest of the weekend. The car ride felt so long on the way back, and matt and i got into a bunch of pesky fights-- all so stupid. But i guess the whole weekend didnt have to be perfect, overall it was still much better than average.

The next two weeks I am training all day at work-- today is the last day of no training so I am hoping to get a lot done. It may leave little time for posting, however ill do what i can before I get my morning coffee. Tonight A and I are hosting the open row for all the novices and rowers without keys...w e are hosting every Monday this month to rack up our volunteer hours. It might rain-- of course-- the days we are in charge we have weather complications. Nothing is ever easy.

Well, better get to those work emails and kick-start the week.

Lists- Weekend Edition and others

I recently started making a list on my whiteboard in my office: To Do. Its a relatively short- not-so-detailed list that I am keeping tracking of important items I cannot forget. I used to do this on College and in high school.... I remember they gave them to us for free in Middle school with a big red apple on in(Orchard Middle School) AGENDA! It was awesome and I wrote down all my school assignments in it. I must admit- o so helpful!

Now and days I rarely create lists... Matt said its just as well because you keep your memory sharp and you are reliant on what you wrote down (which can be prone to errors). Nonetheless, at work-- might as well.

However, here, might as well create lists of things I WANT to do. These can include "must-do's" too, but keeping tracking of those things that dont weigh me down with stress seems very productive.

To before the end of summer:
- Cabin/Camp at hocking hills (mid-September)
-Spend a weekend at at the Wine Vineyard in KY
-Go to the zoo to see the Giraffes
-Go to renaissance fest in September
-Ale-Fest!!!
-wash my car/clean the inside
-Plan a visit for Philli and NY to visit M and Been (date TBD)
-Go to Kings Island
-Start a workout routine
-Plan to cook more great meals
-help matt plan a labor day party--- Plan a fireworks party too
-Heal odie's ear infection
-Bake a pie and use the pie crate Mrs. N gave me

~ i know there are lots more... this list will be amended

Weekend To Do:
-Clean my bathroom
-See caroline (YAY!!!)
-go for a bikeride (and maybe bring bikes back to the nati?)
-visit with my fam


Gotta get back to work!
-

Memories

It's summer time! It is my all time favorite time of the year (with the month of December the exception for Christmas)-- and for some reason the last couple of weeks I am having the hardest time finding things to do after work. For a few months I got into a really eager running routine-- running 30+ miles a week after work. That ended with matt got his new house and didnt want to take to much time after work, I was no longer getting in shape for vacation, and the weather got hot, HOT, hot!

So, I like to stay busy-- to the point where I am not stressed but motivated. I dont know what has come over me lately.... Perhaps I am busy and I am just not stopping to enjoy the pleasures of the moments. But I am just feeling a little restless right now, how can i snap out of it? Last weekend I spend doing fun things outside, going to a chuch cookout, going go goetta-fest, geo-caching (ill explain on another post), swimming, going to an icecream party, tons of random things. During the week it feels much mroe difficult to come up with some novelty. I liked to start cooking and creating new things to have for dinner-- and share with Matt-- but this week the clean-up process has seemed more drudgerous that the enjoyment of the meal. I havent cooked in almost a week a half! We went for a walk yesterday, but Matt was feeling in a slump so we only walked a couple miles and went out for Mexican food, went home, made ice-cream floats, and went to bed. It seemed uneventful, but when i look back it was nice. Every memory is worth it-- whether is it really thrilling and exciting, or just an average day.

It's really hard for me not to stop and reflect and how much things change in such a short period of time. I am watching my friends start lives with husbands, friend's have their first kids, matt's friends and family started families too. It's all so sentimental...this is the last few years of my life ill be looking for average things? It makes me nostalgic, and very excited. I reflect on my childhood.... the little things; setting the table to dinner in the summer time so i could hurry and up and eat and play again. Swimming in the public pool with my sister and best friends, racking leaves in the backyard, building snowmen, watching jeopardy on school nights with my pops before dinner. They seem simple, my my memories are so vivid and so happy.... I cant wait to create more of those moments. For my family. I cant wait to go to the park with my kids, to help them with homework, to cook mac-and cheese for lunch, to go trick-or-treating with them, to building snowman and the correct way to build snow-forts! O the nest i can create with pumpkins and witches on the windows during Halloween, Christmas decorations ALL over the house as xmas time, Easter eggs at easter, o fun and the memories yet to be created. It's the simple things I always need to constantly remind myself is what really matters.

Random Thoughs for Random Acts

I would love to blog on this thing every day about what I am thinking, what's going on in my life, what worries me, what excites me, but often opening up a blank blog page intimidates me to the point where all thoughts just vanish. Today is definitely another one of those days. However, I do have a few things on my mind worth noting (and remembering).

I was supposed to be in New Mexico for the past two days for work but all travel plans back-fired, miserably. And long story- short is sitting in the airport, multiple cancellations, and too much hoping around for me to kill myself for a 1.5 day informational meeting. I couldn't have been more thrilled to drive home from the airport to spend the last part of my weekend with Matt, enjoy the sun, Matt's family, and be away from sitting at gates, watching the clock tick hoping i dont have any more connecting problems. The glory of it all is realizing all the difficulty that would come in my originating city and could just drive myself home.

My heart was woeful to begin with since one of my best college friends is moving away on friday. She had a party where we could spend some time with her, i know things are never the same after some big change like this. I am so happy for her, she is moving to the same city at her PERFECT boyfriend ( of 3+ years) FINALLY, starting grad school (something she has always wanted to do) and starting something new in her life and living on her own and in her own apartment. What an exciting time. Philadelphia is a really fun city, lots to do, lots to see, places to go, and just a hop, skip and a jump to a few VERY fun and exciting cities (atlantic city, new york city, and DC!). I am more than thrilled for her new start, but sad for her to leave. Of course, its purely selfish but i cant help feeling the sadness of her being a 10 hour car ride away. I know it may not be forever-- and ill still see her because her family is still in the area-- but i have to prepare myself for the change.

A lot of things are going through my head right now; Matt's mom because she gave her dog a new home, my other friend whose dad is dying, my sister, my cousin who was in the hospital this week. Life is so short. Life needs to be filled with random (or not so random) acts of kindness. It's never too later, whether you think you dont feel comfortable, you dont know th person enough, its will make you feel weird... something kind remembers none of these things. I mailed a random note to cheer someone up, a random present to make someone laugh, made some get-well phone calls to those i haven't talked to in a while, and baking some brownies for someone I appreciate it. It feels soo good. Some of them, yes, may be thankless.... but I guess I should enjoy the fact that I did something good for someone else. I am swinging my pendulum towards the positve and I believe the positivity will come back to me.